all the man that i need
Near or far, religious zealot or crude materialist, one thing is certain - we ALL love the 80's!
In our never-ending struggle to jack up the grody-to-the-max factor at the Lab...
Osama said only monkeys braid their hair. He told me that the singer Whitney Houston was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen and that she never wore her hair braided. "I want you to fix your hair like hers from now on," he said. "I can't put my fingers through it when it's braided."
He asked me to hit the hookah, but I explained to him that I had a weak system and couldn't handle drugs. Luckily, he didn't insist. He talked about America. He laughed and rambled on about his favorite TV shows: 'The Wonder Years,' 'Miami Vice,' and 'MacGyver'...
Osama kept coming back to Whitney Houston. He asked if I knew her personally when I lived in America. I told him I didn't. He said that he had a paramount desire for Whitney Houston, and although he claimed music was evil, he spoke of someday spending vast amounts of money to go to America and try to arrange a meeting with the superstar...He said he wanted to give Whitney Houston a mansion that he owned in a suburb of Khartoum. He explained to me that to possess Whitney he would be willing to break his color rule and make her one of his wives...Whitney Houston's was the one name that would be mentioned constantly. How beautiful she is, what a nice smile she has, how truly Islamic she is but is just brainwashed by American culture and her husband - Bobby Brown, whom Osama talked about have killed, as if it were normal to have women's husbands killed.
-- An excerpt from Diary of a Lost Girl: The Autobiography of Kola Boof, published in the September 2006 Harper's Magazine, pgs 23-24.
(Boof contends she was Osama bin Laden's mistress in 1996. Even if it's not true, it's got an Kaufman-esque quality to it, like a geo-political open-mike-night-happening or something)
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